5th time’s the charm!

As you might have gathered from my silence, the 4th try did not work. So we went into the 5th try this month not feeling very hopeful and honestly, ready for a break.

I got a new job offer the day after we found out try #4 didn’t work. I accepted the offer and am very excited about it, but felt conflicted about TTCing with a brand new job. So our plan was to continue with try #5 since I wasn’t starting the new job until after this cycle, but if it didn’t work, we’d take a 3 month break from TTC.

I went into cycle #5 already daydreaming about our break. I was going to host happy hours with my friends, re-join the gym so I could get back in shape, and just focus on me and not live my life in 2 week segments.

We used Letrazole again but a higher dose – 10mg. We had 2 follicles, 1 on each ovary. But in true Nikki fashion, my body started surging the day of my monitoring cycle. So I took the trigger shot that morning and went to my appt. I had a 20+mm follicle on each ovary and we scheduled the IUI for the following morning.

The IUI was fine, but the sperm count was lower than usual, so I was convinced from the beginning it wasn’t going to happen for us. So I just continued planning for our long break.

10DPIUI I decided to take a pregnancy test. I was expecting it to be white, just to confirm that the trigger shot was out of my system. But instead I saw a very very faint line. My first thought was “Nope. It’s just the last of the shot in my system.” I didn’t tell S because I was certain it wasn’t a real positive.

Next morning, 11dpiui, I took another test and saw that the faint line had gotten a little darker. What?? I also had ZERO symptoms. With Mabel I knew I was pregnant before I took the test because I almost passed out on the train and I felt twinges in my boobs. I felt totally normal at this point.

I went out and bought more tests because I was still convinced it wasn’t positive. But what do you know, the new test said I was pregnant!

I told Sophia when she got home from work by having Mabel hand her the pregnancy test while wearing a shirt that said World’s Best Sister.

Needless to say, S was ecstatic! My reaction has been surprisingly subdued. My first thought was concern for Mabel and how she’ll react to not being an only child. I’m also a little concerned about my new job and having to tell them I’ll be out for maternity leave before I’ve even been there a year (I start that job tomorrow!). I don’t plan on telling them until I’m past the first trimester.

Even now, a week after we found out try #5 worked, I can’t quite work up the enthusiasm that S has. Is this normal? Don’t get me wrong, I so want this baby, but why am I not floating on air or dancing with glee yet? I have a warm glow when thinking about it, but I’m just not EXCITED like I thought I’d be. I’m assuming that will come?

Beta at 12dpiui was 45. Then we went on vacation for 5 days. I did another blood test as soon as we got back at 17dpiui and it was 624. Don’t know the doubling rate since we have the 5 day gap between the blood work, but 624 seems to be totally normal for this far along. Go again tomorrow to see where we’re at and hopefully schedule an ultrasound in the next couple of weeks.

Fingers crossed this guy sticks around!

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Oh yeah, we’re on try #4

Sooo, yeah. The last IUI did not produce a pregnancy. I sorta knew that as I didn’t have any symptoms at all leading up to the test date. Normally, I don’t like to test, preferring to wait until my period starts. However, taking progesterone means my period won’t start until I stop the medication. And I can’t stop the medication until I know I’m not pregnant. Not ideal, but whatever. So I tested on 13piui. Big fat negative.

So onto the next round. The stats in bullet form:

  • Donor – same as last try. Though this is the last vial they have, so if this doesn’t work, we’ll have to pick a new one
  • Medication: 10mg Letrozole on CD3-7.
  • Monitoring ultrasound: June 14, CD11.
  • Follicles: 1 on my left at 19mm, 1 on my right at 18mm
  • Trigger: the night of June 14, CD11at 11:10pm
  • IUI – June 16, CD13 at 11:10am
  • Still on progesterone this cycle

So fingers crossed. Now that we’re halfway through the 2WW, we’re entering the part where I’m hyper aware of any tiny possible pregnancy symptoms. Trying to keep my mind off it.

One way I’m doing that is prepping for potty training! We’ve been very casual about it so far, but decided to go for it. I’m taking time off in early July so I can focus on it for 4 days straight. We decided that since Mabel is starting preschool in late August, we wanted to either train her now or wait a few months until she settled into school. Also, we feel better having her nanny help us in the first few weeks of training rather than her preschool teachers. Mabel totally trust Martha (her nanny) and I think she’s more likely to be successful with her that first month. So I’ve been reading the book “Oh Crap” in preparation and mentally prepping.

Gonna try to not test until Saturday, June 30. We have 2 different birthday parties lined up that day, so at least we have some fun things planned. And plenty of alcohol available if the test is negative.

It’s on

We finally got ahead of my body! Largest follicle is 20 and I’m not surging yet. So I took the trigger shot immediately and the IUI is tomorrow at 10:30am – about 26 hours after the trigger shot. The smaller follicle from Wednesday only grew from 13 to 14 in two days so it’s no longer a contender.

For the first time since we started trying for baby #2, I have zero concerns about the timing!

Try #3

Life is full these days. With the nice weather upon us we finally cleaned up our backyard and used some savings to purchase a nice picnic table and seating area for the patio. Now we eat dinner outside almost every day. The veggie garden is growing and I’m excited for summer.

We threw a birthday party for S last weekend and it was a hit! Now onto Mabel’s party. She turns 2 next week, but we’re throwing her party on June 2. May is a busy month, man.

On the TTC front, I had my baseline ultrasound last week and everything looked good. Dr. H mixed things up this time and put me on Letrozole. No idea why, but I’m not complaining, as I had ZERO side effects. No mood swings, no headaches. I kept forgetting I was on it. I spent the last few days looking for fertile mucus, but it has yet to show up. I went it for an ultrasound yesterday (CD12) and had 2 dominant follicles. One was 15 and the other measured 13. Still small, so that explains why I haven’t seen any mucus yet. Even though Clomid gave me more large follicles, I still prefer Letrozole. I feel like myself instead of a hormone driven crazy person.

I normally have my positive OPK on CD13, so apparently this cycle is going a little more slowly. I go back in Friday morning (CD14) to check the follicle growth and was told to bring the trigger shot with me, as they might administer it right then for a Saturday IUI. If I get a positive OPK today or tomorrow morning, they’re going to give me an ovulation test in office as well to make sure I really am surging. Our last 2 tries, my body kept jumping ahead of the plan and surging before we got a chance to check the follicle growth a second time. I’m hopeful this cycle we can get ahead of my body and control the ovulation timing. I haven’t felt any of my typical ovulation symptoms yet.

I also am managing a large fundraising event this friday night, so all these dr appts in the middle of event prep is making this week super fun (sarcasm). I’m coming home after Mabel’s bedtime each day to make up for getting into the office late due to the appts. So ready for Saturday to get here so we can just relax for a bit.

Still Not Pregnant

Work has been crazy this past month! One big event 2 weeks ago and another one in 3 weeks. So that’s kept me from updating. Also, we took a break from TTC this month, so it was great to just not think about it. Not track anything. Not worry about timing.

Not only did I not get pregnant on our last try, I started my period 4 DAYS EARLY! And then went on to have a 10-day long period! Wha??? I was so sure that having 4 large eggs would ensure success, but here we are.

I told our doctor about the early period and she wants to put me on progesterone for our next try. When I first started tracking my cycle last fall, I had 2 luteal phases that were only 10 or 11 days long, so I’m glad to be on the progesterone next time.

So we took this month off and it was so nice to just live life and not plan everything around doctors appt or worry if I schedule any morning meetings, they might conflict with the IUI timing.

Because we used the last of Mabel’s donor last month, we’ve had to pick out a new donor. S took the lead and narrowed it down to 3 guys. And together, we picked the one we liked most. We went by the same guidelines we used for Mabel – same hair and eye color as S, tall, and good family medical history. It was actually much easier than I thought.

So where are we now? Just waiting for my period to start. Our good friends had a baby last week and it brought out all our baby fever again. So the break was nice and needed, but we’re ready to get back on the TTC saddle.

In other news, Mabel turns 2 this month! How did this happen? Her birth feels like yesterday. I’m loving this stage for her. She’s stringing her words together and we’re able to have actual conversations. She asks for “mama ‘nuggles” now when we watch a movie. She’s loving music class. So much so that we’re getting her a small drum and some shakers for her birthday. Love watching her personality take shape.

Change of Plans

So. Yeah.

I was told to keep taking OPKs and if it was positive this morning, I needed to take the trigger shot immediately and schedule an IUI on Friday.

Well, of course, I was surging this morning. I saw that I suddenly had a lot of fertile mucus this morning and thought, oh god. I bet I’m surging.

lol and behold, I was. I had just tested yesterday evening and it was still really light, so sometime between 6pm last night and 10am this morning, my LH shot through the roof.

So instead of giving myself the trigger tonight, I did it this morning. And the IUI is tomorrow at 10:50am instead of Saturday. Because ovulation is already in motion, taking the shot is really more of a “belt and suspenders” situation (my doctor’s words). We’re hoping it pushes my body to release all 4 eggs.

Thank goodness I picked up the sperm this morning. Almost scheduled the pick up for Friday, but actually thought to myself “what if I surge early?”

Fingers crossed this cycle is the one!

Round Two

Just got back from my monitoring ultrasound. The Clomid queasiness went away after the first day. Yay! After that, I only noticed some moodiness. But at least I was able to recognize WHY I would suddenly be consumed with rage and I was able to calm myself down.

Before the appointment today, we decided that if the Clomid didn’t give me two viable eggs, we would cancel the cycle. The only reason we’re taking it is to up our chances, so we are lucky that we can be choosy and wait for the next cycle if need be.

It’s CD11 today and I went in to the appt. expecting to see two viable eggs, with a possible second ultrasound appt on Friday and a trigger shot this weekend and insemination on Monday.

What happened is we saw FOUR large eggs and will trigger tomorrow night. On my left ovary: 18mm, 16.5mm. On the right: 17mm, 17mm. (Is mm the unit of measurement? I can’t remember)

Granted, it’s not guaranteed that all 4 will ovulate. The 16.5 might stop growing before Saturday. But I’m feeling hopeful. The doctor wants to wait 1 more day before I take the trigger shot- to let them get a bit bigger. So I trigger Thursday night at 9:50pm and the IUI is scheduled for Saturday at 9:50am. I’m to keep taking OPKs and if I get a positive tomorrow morning, I should take the trigger shot in the morning and they’ll do the IUI Friday. I don’t think that’ll happen though. My OPK this morning was really light.

They did make me confirm that if all 4 eggs fertilize, we would be ok with “selective reduction” meaning they would reduce the fetus number down to 2. If we weren’t ok doing that, they would recommend canceling this cycle because of the higher ( but still really tiny) odds of multiples. We’re ok with this, though it makes me incredibly sad to think of choosing which ones to keep. Thankfully, the odds of all 4 fertilizing are really, really small.

So we’ve got the trigger shot in the fridge and now we just wait. Hoping cycle #2 is the lucky one, as it was with Mabel!

Clomid

Just jumping on here quickly with a Clomid question.

AF started Sunday afternoon, but by Monday afternoon I had the Clomid prescription in my hand and am feeling hopeful. This is my first time on Clomid, but I’ve read about people’s experiences on it and did my research. I’m on 100mg/day.

My question: has anyone experienced all day nausea from it? I took it this morning with a big bowl of yogurt and I’ve felt like I’m on the verge of throwing up all day. Is this normal? I was hoping it would pass but here we are 5 hours later and it hasn’t. Just curious.

Big Fat Nope

So even though today is 14dpiui, I caved and took a test yesterday morning. It was undoubtedly negative. Not even a tiny hint of a second line.

I’m surprisingly ok with it. I didn’t have any major symptoms during the TWW, just the typical PMS/pregnancy symptoms of slight cramps, gassiness, and some moodiness.

AF hasn’t shown up yet, but she should by tomorrow. I’ve already emailed Dr. H to ask if we can use Clomid for this next cycle, only because it’s our last donor vial. And hopefully, we’ll get to have multiple ultrasounds before I surge so we can better track the follicle(s) growth.

If this next cycle doesn’t work, we’ll likely wait a month or so before trying again. My work schedule is crazy in April and I’ll be ovulating the week of a very large event I’m managing. I will definitely not have time for ultrasound appts that week.

Also, we’ll have to pick out a new donor. Just the thought of spending $800 for another vial makes my stomach hurt. Thank goodness we use a sperm bank we can drive to, so at least we don’t have to pay for shipping.

But I’m getting ahead of myself. This next cycle might be the one!

Even though I was pretty laid back about this first try for Baby #2, I can feel myself starting to stress a bit about this next one. I’m gonna see if I can schedule an acupuncture appt right before this IUI and maybe one right after it too.

Send your sticky baby thoughts my way. I’m crossing my fingers for all of you TTCing out there right now! Good luck!

 

Try #1 for Baby #2

Remember when I said we’d start tying in March? Well, we decided to go ahead and try this month. Honestly, I’m pretty sure it was because a friend of ours had a baby 2 weeks ago and after seeing her tiny newborn, we thought, “Why not? Let’s go for it.”

So I called the RE on CD 1 and they scheduled the first appt for monitoring on Feb 20 -CD10.

At the appointment, the ultrasound showed that my eggs were still small – I had 1 11mm and 1 10mm egg and a bunch of tiny ones – but my lining was already thick and ready to go. The Dr. actually thought maybe I had already ovulated. She said the lining usually doesn’t get that thick until the eggs are larger. But I know my body and I knew I hadn’t ovulated yet. Nevertheless, she sent me to get blood work to double check. Sure enough, my progesterone was almost nonexistent, my LH was still low but my estrogen was on the rise. No ovulation.

After we got the blood work results the next day, the Dr. scheduled my next ultrasound appt for Friday, Feb 23, but noted that my blood work indicated that I’d be ovulating in the next 2-4 days. I was instructed to keep taking OPKs and if it’s positive, call. If it’s still negative on Friday, then I should bring the trigger shot with me to the appt and she’d likely give it to me that morning for a Saturday afternoon IUI.

As soon as I got the blood work results on Wednesday, I started noticing fertile mucus and realized I’m probably not gonna have time to take the trigger shot. Sure enough, Thursday morning I got a positive on the OPK. The night before, the line had barely shown on the test, so I was a little surprised. I took another OPK an hour or so later to double check and sure enough, it was positive too. I called the clinic and they just turned my Friday ultrasound appt into an insemination appt.

Friday morning, my OPKs were STILL positive, which actually worried me that we were doing the IUI too early. Frozen sperm live for such a short time (just 24 hours!) , the timing is crucial. If my body waited until Saturday afternoon to release the egg, all of the sperm will already have died off by then. In my frantic last-minute research, I read that most women ovulate around 24 hours after the beginning of their LH surge. That reassured me enough to go ahead with the IUI on Friday morning, which was 24 hours after the beginning of my surge.

The IUI itself was fine and uneventful. 21 million motile sperm after the vial was thawed, which was more than I expected. The only crappy thing was, I had no idea which ovary would be releasing the egg. With the cycle that brought us Mabel, because of the monitoring ultrasounds, I knew which side was releasing the egg and therefore laid on that side for 20 min or so right after the IUI to help encourage the sperm to go in that direction. But because I only had the one ultrasound this cycle and my body didn’t have a dominant follicle yet, I had no idea which side was the winner. So I just laid down for 10 min on each side. Fingers crossed the sperm made it to the correct fallopian tube.

And now we wait. This TWW is way different than the one two years ago. I have a packed work schedule, a quick overnight work trip and a toddler to chase around. I’m gonna have to look through my old posts and see what some of my first pregnancy symptoms were. I’m already tired all the time, so fatigue won’t be noticed. I’m also not checking my temps because my sleep is too erratic. Mabel is sleeping through the night about 3-4 nights a week. But those other nights have us up around 4 or so. So I know my temps would be all over the place.

Once again, I’m committed to not taking a pregnancy test until my period is late. I know myself and I could easily fall down the rabbit hole of peeing on lots and lots of sticks and analyzing whether there’s a faint line. So yeah, not gonna do that to myself. So that puts test day on March 10th! Yikes!